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Thursday, February 17, 2011

One Simple Way to Becoming a Happier Person

There is no reason why you can't be a happy person most of the time.

I am, and a lot of people find that disconcerting. They think there is something wrong with it, with me, for being so pleasant so often. Is there really something so unusual about a person who smiles whenever you see them? The fact that I get weird looks a lot just because of my naturally happy disposition tells me that this world could definitely use more happiness. So I'll tell you one of my secrets, and the great part is, it's actually really easy once you get the hang of it!

Don't waste energy on what you can't change or affect NOW.
How often do you encounter someone who is unhappy or in a bad mood because of something that is happening that very instant? Not very often in my experience. The question, "what's wrong?" usually gets responses like, "I had a bad morning," "I'm pissed off at (blank)," "I have to do (blank) later and I'm not looking forward to it," among many others. People spend a lot of time being emotionally effected by things that already happened and are over with, or things that haven't even happened yet. You all know that we only live in this moment. Anything else is just a memory, or a projection, it isn't the life you're living right now. So why are you wasting your time in this life being consumed by memories or projections?

My rule of thumb is, if you can't do anything to change it NOW, then don't worry about it until you can. 

You can't change the fact that you spilled coffee all over your desk, so why are you wasting energy being upset about it? Feel what you need to feel while you're cleaning up, and then move on. Find yourself getting irritable because you know you have a meeting coming up that you're not prepared for? Do whatever you can to increase your sense of readiness and then roll with it because you're as ready as you're going to be- why waste valuable energy on a bad mood when you can simply reinvest it in yourself?

The sooner you realize that the things you have no power to change aren't worth the energy required to worry and fret about them, the sooner you'll realize how much energy you have left to enjoy the little good things- like the coworker who brought you another coffee after you spilled yours, or the boss who really enjoyed your contributions even though you thought you weren't prepared enough.

When you let go of things you can't change, you naturally become more aware of all the different ways that the universe is trying to make you feel better.

I know this is a little cliche, but I'll say it anyway! It takes 43 muscles to frown, and only 17 to smile, just like it only requires a little bit of energy to be happy but it sucks up a whole lot more when you focus on things you want to change and can't.

 Be happy, doofus. It's easy.


  1. Thanks for sharing, I agree with you and even tough I know it in my head, sometimes my heart cant help but worry. It takes discipline but, yes, it is possible. Here's to a happy tomorrow!
    ~Norma, EBT member

  2. Cheers to you Norma! It's a funny thing though, that happiness can sometimes be hard work. But I think it all starts with simply smiling more and finding small things to be happy about :)